“Even When”

Even when the sun isn’t shining on me
And the pain makes it hard to believe
That you came with a love and a heartbeat to set us free
Even when it’s so hard to just face the day
And my regrets try to get in the way
Even when my mind says “give up”
I’ll remember you give me strength to say

Let the rain fall on me and wash away everything
I think I need, I’ll still believe
There’s hope beyond yesterday, I’m not gonna run away
I’ll count on you to be my strength again, even when

Even When, Tim Drisdelle (time for an Itunes visit!)

. . . And then there are days where I’m sure I would have been better off staying in bed.  Why not?  It seems like most things go wrong, the day is loaded up with discouragement, and my failures get in the way of any usefulness I might attempt.

The path of following Christ is joy, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t sorrows along the way, too.  This world is such an interwoven mix of emotions, and on any given day, I’m bound to experience most of them.

If I had the opportunity to live in only peace, I’d take it–or I would have, before I knew Christ.  But now that I know Him, I know something I never imagined: God, who is love and therefore has a natural ease to be joyful all the time, took the sorrow of the cross to die for our sins.  He didn’t have to do that.  But He came down to our world of mixed-up messes and all the gray we complain is between the black & white.

Why?  That’s the mystery of God.

I know I don’t fully understand love, because God is love, and I don’t fully understand God–not even close.  Would I really give up even small comforts for the sake of someone else?  Well, I say I would, but the truth is, I usually don’t.  If I can’t do it now, what on earth makes me think if I had perfect joy that I could give it up?

Only God could do that.  Only God would do that.

There are so many spinning plates right now.  So many things I’m not doing well.  So many things I can’t figure out.  So many things that crash and break.

There’s a man in Iran who got a death sentence because he believes in Christ.  And there’s a child in Togo who’s waiting on a letter from me.  What?  How can this be?  All around me I see hate and love, anger and forgiveness, bitterness and freedom, grief and joy.  This world is doing a very strange dance, it seems.  Good and evil as partners–right?

It may look like they’re partners, but really, they’re pushing against each other.  As hard as they can.  And the question I have to ask myself is, which side am I pushing for?  Right now, in this moment?  Even when?

“Even when the sun isn’t shining on me.” 

Do I push for good over evil even when the sun isn’t out?  Or do I wait for God to part the clouds?

I want to be an “even when” Christian.

And here’s the ultimate “even when”:

But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved. (Ephesians 2:4-5, NIV)

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Published in: on February 24, 2012 at 9:18 pm  Leave a Comment  
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