The difference of purpose

I wrote this thought on my life as a new believer . .

I used to live in fear of panic attacks.  I had so much anxiety that at times I felt like I could only stand to live because I was afraid of dying.

To wake up in the morning and want to get up, to be frustrated because there are not enough hours in the day for me to do all I want to do for Jesus . . is a gift I can’t write in words.

I used to wonder if I could get up to spindle out my day, trying to shut out my misery with the blast of the television or action of a video game . . now I feel as if I really matter.  As if each second of my life is precious to God.  As if He has work for me.  Not part-time, no lay-offs, and no vacation—I love it.  I get to devote my life totally to God.

Now of course I don’t always do that, but I can and I want to.  I’ve been hired.  I can go out and harvest God’s fields, even if I didn’t start until 12:00 (see Jesus’ parable, Matthew 20:1-7).

“The kingdom of heaven is like a person who owned some land. One morning, he went out very early to hire some people to work in his vineyard. The man agreed to pay the workers one coin for working that day. Then he sent them into the vineyard to work. About nine o’clock the man went to the marketplace and saw some other people standing there, doing nothing. So he said to them, ‘If you go and work in my vineyard, I will pay you what your work is worth.’ So they went to work in the vineyard. The man went out again about twelve o’clock and three o’clock and did the same thing. About five o’clock the man went to the marketplace again and saw others standing there. He asked them, ‘Why did you stand here all day doing nothing?’ They answered, ‘No one gave us a job.’ The man said to them, ‘Then you can go and work in my vineyard.’ (Matthew 20:1-7, NCV)

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